101 Ways To Woo Abby Maitland
by thelilacfield
Summary: From emails to text messages, from Pizza Hut to Star Wars conventions, Connor certainly known how to woo a woman. ConnorAbby


To: LizardGrl  
From: GameboyAdvanced  
Subject: BORED!

Hi Abby!  
I'm incredibly bored! What are we doing here anyway?  
Love,  
Connor  
P.S You look particularly gorgeous today.

To: GameboyAdvanced  
From: LizardGrl  
Subject: Re: BORED!

Connor,  
It's not like I'm not bored out of my skull too! We're here 'cos of that sabre-tooth in a supermarket. Were you paying any attention at all when Lester told us we were coming here today? Oh yeah, obviously not!  
Abby  
P.S And you look particularly scruffy!

To: LizardGrl  
From: GameboyAdvanced  
Subject: Re: BORED!

C'mon, Abby, give a guy a chance! At least let me take you to this really cool video game convention tonight! We can have a curry at that takeaway: The Red Hot Chilli Peppers or something. I'll bring my own money!  
Love,  
The utterly gorgeous and fantastic,  
Connor xxx

To: GameboyAdvanced  
From: LizardGrl  
Subject: Re: BORED!

Connor, video game conventions and takeaway curries are your kind of date, not mine. Stop sending me emails! Everyone keeps giving me weird looks when my computer pings. Shut up!  
A. M.

To: LizardGrl  
From: GameboyAdvanced  
Subject: GIMME!

Well, give me your home email address then! Please go out with me! I'll do anything for you!  
Love from,  
The long suffering,  
Connor xxx

To: GameboyAdvanced  
From: LizardGrl  
Subject: Re: GIMME!

Connor,  
I will never in a squintillion years give you my email address. You bug me enough on this one! Now leave me alone!  
Annoyed Abby.

To: Lizard Grl  
From: N. Cutter  
Subject: Why?

Why is Connor sending you so many emails? Is he asking you out? You bored?  
Cutter  
P.S I am bored out of my skull!

To: N. Cutter  
From: LizardGrl  
Subject: Re: Why?

Dunno, no, yes, tee hee!  
Abby

To: LizardGrl  
From: Doctor P.  
Subject: Err…

Err, Abby, is it my imagination, or is that women going on and on about toilet paper? Just for clarification, y'know!  
Sarah  
P.S Danny asked me out yesterday. Should I say yes?

To: Doctor P.  
From: LizardGrl  
Subject: Re: Err…

It's just your imagination; she's helping us come up with a good cover story! You should deffo say yes to Danny. You two make such a great couple!  
Later!  
ABBY!XXX

To: GameboyAdvanced  
From: Detective  
Subject: date

Connor, me and Sarah are going on a date tonight. Where should I take her? I'm so confused!

Danny.

To: Detective  
From: GameboyAdvanced  
Subject: Re: date

Take her to that fancy restaurant called…um… oh yeah! The Four Seasons. They have a really nice dance floor as well. Good luck, bro!  
Connor

To: GameboyAdvanced  
From: Detective  
Subject: Re: date

Thanks mate! Virtual high five!

To: GameboyAdvanced  
From: LizardGrl  
Subject: DON'T

Don't you dare bug me once more! I am concentrating so leave me alone. Ah, peace and quiet!  
An Outraged Abby!

To: LizardGrl  
From: GameboyAdvanced  
Subject: Re: DON'T!

*meekly* Sorry Abby. I swear on Stephen's grave that I won't bug you again!  
Love,  
An extensively humbled  
Connor Temple  
Your slave for life

-MSN-

GameboyAdvanced:  
Hi, Abby!

LizardGrl:  
WTF! Connor, how do you know my MSN name?

GameboyAdvanced:  
Claudia gave it to me.

LizardGrl:  
THAT TRAITOR!

GameboyAdvanced:  
Wot u want 2 do 2nite? 'Coz Star Wars III: Revenge of the Sith is on at the cinema, and I was wondering if u wanted to-

LizardGrl:  
Stop right there! I'm not going with you! Connor, I don't want to go out on a date with you and that's final!

GameboyAdvanced:  
WHY? *sniffles*

LizardGrl:  
Cos…cos…cos I don't WANT to!

GameboyAdvanced:  
Rite then, I'll leave you alone then!

LizardGrl:  
Connor, no, wait, I didn't mean that!

LizardGrl:  
Connor? Don't go…

YOUR TARGET IS NO LONGER AVAILABLE

LIZARDGRL:  
GAMEBOYADVANCED has removed you from his MSN friends list.

GAMEBOYADVANCED:  
LIZARDGRL has removed you from her MSN friends list.

To: GameboyAdvanced  
From: LizardGrl  
Subject: …

Connor, I miss you. Please talk to me. My home email address is . Email me anytime you want. I just…need to talk to you.  
Love ya,  
Abby

To: LizardGrl  
From: ClaudiaCutter  
Subject: O.K?

Hi Abby,  
U alright these days. What's up between you and Connor? You guys have a fight or something? Guess what? I'm pregnant again! Please tell us what's up! Me and Sarah are really worried about you!  
Claudia x

To: ClaudiaCutter  
From: LizardGrl  
Subject: Re: O.K?

Hi Claudia,  
No, I'm not O.K! When you gave Connor my MSN name he IM'ed me and he asked me out. I said something so stupid and now he won't even look at me, let alone talk to me! I miss him so much. I just want to tell him I love him! Can you talk to him for me? Please! Just to tell him how I feel.  
Abby.  
P.S: Congratulations. You and Nick make great parents an I'm sure you'll welcome a new baby.

To: LizardGrl  
From: ClaudiaCutter  
Subject: Re: O.K?

Oh my gosh, you poor thing. Don't worry, Sarah and I will sort him out for you!  
Claudia xoxo

To: ClaudiaCutter  
From: LizardGrl  
Subject: Re: O.K? AGAIN!

Thanks. *starts crying*

To: Doctor P.  
From: ClaudiaCutter  
Subject: Abby & Connor

Hi Sarah,  
I have to talk to you about Abby. She sent me this email and she seems so upset.

_No, I'm not O.K! When you gave Connor my MSN name he IM'ed me and he asked me out. I said something so stupid and now he won't even look at me, let alone talk to me! I miss him so much. I just want to tell him I love him! Can you talk to him for me? Please! Just to tell him how I feel.  
Abby.  
_-  
I think we should do something. You talk to Connor, I'll get Nick updated, and maybe Lester. You in?

To: ClaudiaCutter  
From: Doctor P.  
Subject: Re: Abby & Connor

I'm IN! Operation Get-Abby-And-Connor-Back-Together commences in exactly ten minutes, when we finally get out of this boring meeting.

To: Doctor P.  
From: ClaudiaCutter  
Subject: Re: Abby & Connor

Thanks, Sarah! I knew I could count on you!

To: N. Cutter, Sir J. P. Lester  
From: ClaudiaCutter  
Subject: Operation Get-Abby-And-Connor-Back-Together

Hi guys!  
Listen, Abby and Connor aren't speaking and it's 50% my fault! I gave Connor Abby's MSN name, so he asked her out, but she rejected him, so now…well, you've seen for yourself. Please help me. I want to get them back together! I feel so horribly guilty!  
Claudia

To: ClaudiaCutter  
From: N. Cutter  
Subject: Re: Operation Get-Abby-And-Connor-Back-Together

Count me in, Claudia. A rift in the team isn't great. I want to see them happy again.  
Nick

To: ClaudiaCutter  
From: Sir J. P. Lester  
Subject: Re: Operation Get-Abby-And-Connor-Back-Together

Don't you just hate it when people bring their personal lives to work with them.

To: Sir J. P. Lester  
From: ClaudiaCutter, N. Cutter  
Subject: Lester

SHUT UP, LESTER!

To: GameboyAdvanced  
From: Doctor P.  
Subject: Abby

Why are you being an asshole and ignoring Abby? She misses you, and I know you miss her! Just talk to her!  
Sarah

To: Doctor P.  
From: GameboyAdvanced  
Subject: Re: Abby

Miss her? I don't miss her! You just assume that!  
Connor  
P.S And I am not an asshole!

To: GameboyAdvanced  
From: Doctor P.  
Subject: Yeah right!

Yeah right, Connor. You miss her, admit it! She misses you. She wants to tell you how she feels! Just, for once in your life, listen to what she has to say! You idiot, Connor. I know you love her!  
Sarah.

To: Doctor P.  
From: GameboyAdvanced  
Subject: !

WTF! That was crazy. But, O.K, I'll talk to her.  
Connor

To:  
From:  
Subject: Sorry

Abby,  
I'm so sorry for ignoring you all this time. I know I've made you cry and I'm not proud of it. Let me make it up to you. I'll take you to Pizza Express tonight. Pizza and champagne-wanna come?  
Connor

To:  
From:  
Subject: Re: Sorry

On, fine then. But you're paying.

To:  
From:  
Subject: Re: Sorry

Brill, great, excellent and all those words! Seven tonight? I'll take you to see a movie too. Love Actually is on at the cinema. Yes?

To:  
From:  
Subject: Re: Sorry

*laughs* It's a date.

The Final Stage Of Wooing

To Abby,  
This letter is too important to simply send to you via email. But I've finally found my place in the world, and it is right here beside you. I love everything about you: your eyes, your laugh, your outrageous personality. I'm more sorry than you can imagine about leaving you. I now understand how upset I made you and exactly how much you missed me. I want to ensure that never happens again. So, now I'm going to ask you what I'm too shy to say to your face:  
Abby Maitland, will you marry me?  
Connor

To Connor,  
One word:

YES!

Abby xx


End file.
